I realized this week that I have a problem with people in authority.

I don’t like being told what to do. I like the freedom of working and doing what I choose and be paid for it but on my terms with my abilities and my skills without having any one hovering looking over my shoulder to peer into my world to fact check and verify what I’m up to.

Woo. That was a long sentence!

I never realized it so deeply as I have this week. It came up for me so much that I’ve noticed it as a detriment to my character. It’s not a good thing to want so much freedom and independence that I can’t play well with others, and I can’t be a part of a team.

I crave a certain kind of life and to be the person that God Himself created me to be. If I can’t play well with others and don’t respect their opinions, that’s not showing the love of Christ that he proclaimed so profusely in His word. I want to be as Christ, however my human flesh prevents me from going any further in this walk right now.

But, that ends tonight. I want all that Christ has for me with no settling and no limitations. I want it all, Dad. So tonight I cry out to You in hope laying all of my dreams out on the table.

I will read your word and do your word like the world’s greatest instruction booklet. Teach me how to live, Father. I want to do Your will.

Amen.