I am in a pickle.
You see. I’m a very emotional and sensitive person (if you haven’t figured that out yet.)
And something happened that sent my social anxiety whirling.
I hate it. And I definitely hate feeling vulnerable. Do you?
I’m that type of person who can’t stop thinking about things that make me feel embarrassed or humiliated. I have a hard time getting past things, so it takes me longer than most.
Or at least it feels like it to me.
It’s like it gets stuck on a conveyor belt in my brain and gets set on “loop.” I’m working really hard on breathing and letting it go. I say to myself, “The past is the past. I can’t change anything now.” Or as my Sis likes to say. “It is what it is.”
I feel things really deeply. Not that you don’t! I’m just sharing how I feel. In fact, I read this book called The Highly Sensitive Person by Elaine N. Aron, Ph. D. And yep, that’s me. I’m over here raising my hand.
I’m sensitive.
And I’m just going to embrace it.
I take more time to heal from things emotionally than other people I know. And that’s okay. It’s who God created me to be.
I dread awkward situations. I dread feeling embarrassed or raw. Vulnerable might as well be a four-letter word. While others go out there and live life YOLO-ing it all over the place, my first instinct is to cower in a corner because I might do something to embarrass myself.
Yeah, I feel stupid about it too.
But it’s who God has made me to be.
I really want to embrace all of the teachings of Jesus Christ. But in my flesh, it’s sometimes not that easy. Especially when I’m feeling good, going strong, everything is going great and then BAM! Something happens that sends me reeling back to square one.
Does this happen to you too? I would assume it does. It’s called “being human,” right?
At least that’s what I tell myself so I can feel somewhat normal. LOL
A friend of mine said to me yesterday, “All we can do is learn and do things differently next time.”
Sage advice, if you ask me. That’s all we/I can do.
Why am I telling you this?
Because I’m here to encourage you today. Are you a Highly Sensitive Person too?
Because God created us to be this type of person for a reason.
Because we all have bad days.
All of us.
We all do or say things at times that we regret, but there’s no way of changing what happened.
Maybe we need to be slow to anger and quick to love?
Whoever is slow to anger has great understanding, but he who has a hasty temper exalts folly.
Proverbs 14:29
All we can do is say, “Sorry,” and mean it. Then pick up and press on.
As best we can with our super-sensitive hearts. And I will give it all to God. To take care of. To fix for me. Because I’m a stupid human who does stupid things at times while I learn and navigate this path of being a Christ follower.
All I know is God can handle this.
He always does.
